Things have been moving right along at the House of Stone. The girls are getting ready for summer, asking for trips to the pool (I have yet to give in on that one), chasing down the icecream truck and spending quite a lot of time in the back (and front) yards. I'm reminded daily of just how fast they are growing.
Ellabee heads off to Kindergarten in the fall and I feel an impending sense of dread. I have five more months with her at home, with no schedule and no obligations and then she's out - on the way to becoming a young lady. I know, she's only 5 but it certainly feels that way. She is going to Westminster in the fall and one of their primary distinctives is a 12 to K focus. Meaning... instead of looking at the child and developing a curriculum around that, we look at the adult we hope they will become and develop the curriculum needed to acheive those results. I guess in reading about that and thinking through our parenting and our children, I hope about the women this little ladies will become but somewhat dread that time when we send them off into the world, down the aisle or wherever the Lord may lead them.
I've been reflecting on James 4 a lot lately. Not only is my firstborn about to begin the journey to school, etc but I'm looking at my first true class of seniors at Restoration. These are kids that though I've known them for only 12 months, they've become ingrained in my heart and on my mind. I think of and pray for them almost as much as my own children and I have so many hopes for the adults they are becoming. James 4: 13 - 15 says:
Now listen, you who say, "today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little hwile and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "if it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that."
So many times, I make my plans, figure out my hopes and in doing so, invite God along for the ride. "Here is my plan God... come along if you like." When instead, I should say "God what is your plan. where would you have me. What is your hope for my children?" And then I'm looking at celebrating the baptism of a precious Covenant child tomorrow with dear friends who happen to be the parents. What's amazing to me is that his steps are already numbered. God knows what will happen in sweet Cobb's life. God knows what we will grow up to be. The mystery is that we are encourage to have hopes and dreams for these covenant children... even though the story is already written. It's a mystery... so much of life is.
And then there's the mundane. A last minute trip to a retreat for church that was an incredible blessing, the start of a bible study at church, eating popcorn in the backyard and ongoing frustration that I cannot seem to get it all done. If I sew, the house doesn't get cleaned. If i spend time with a sister in Christ, I end up dropping the ball on something else. Work, home. Children, friends. Husband, parents. It all runs together sometimes and I wonder if this IS god's will and path... and then I haphazardly pick up a book by Elisabeth Elliot... a choice made not because I wanted the book, but I forgot a magazine and was faced with three hours getting my hair done. I grabbed this one because of two things: 1. the title spoke to me, 2. I knew this author and was hesitant to grab someone with whose theology I'm not familiar...
Here's the opening quote from Keep a Quiet Heart by Elisabeth Elliot:
Do Not Rush. Trust. And Keep a Quiet Heart
I think I find most help in trying to look on all the interruptions and hindrances to work that one has planned out for oneself as discipline, trials sent by God to help one against getting selfish over one's work. Then one can feel that perhaps one's true work - one's work for God - consists in doing some trifling haphazard ting that has been thrown into one's day. It is not a waste of time, that has been thrown into one's day. It is not a waste of time, as one is tempted to think, it is the most important part of the work of the day - the part one can best offer to God. After such a hindrance, do not rush after the planned work; trust that the time to finish it will be given sometime, and keep a quiet heart about it.
- Annie Keary, 1825 - 1979
And then I'm reminded. The raising of young women after God's heart. The work I do with our seniors at RA. The house cleaning. The porch sitting. It's all a "haphazard" attempt a pleasing God... when in reality, i don't TRY at all. It's like God removes the pride and my ability to offer it by keeping me in chaos so that it is truly a work unto him. Offered from a broken selfish mess of a woman who is really REALLY seeking just to be at the feet of Christ.
Here are some pics from our week ... even they are haphazard!
A favorite snack at our house - POPCORN
Man's best friend? Nope, a friend of little girls, he is.
Liza and Maisy... on the retreat
spending time with Mary Holland at the lodge.