So, I'm at O'Henry's right now and there is this LOUD couple sitting halfway across the coffee shop having a annoying conversation. For that I must apologize because I'm something distracted wtih eavesdropping.
It was pointed out to me today that I drink A LOT of coffee and caffeine in general - and it struck me that they are right. I'm a caffeine addict. Is that a problem? I'm not sure - I'm going to have to dwell on it a bit more. But thought I'd throw it out there for the sake of disclosure. I'm on a lot of caffeine right now.
John did the 1/2 Ironman last weekend. We loaded up the girls and headed to Panama City Beach (where I'm proud to say I've never been really) for the Ironman weekend. He didn't finish the race, which was very suprising to me. It wasn't a matter of not training enough or mental toughness. He got seasick in the ocean - couldn't have seen that coming. He actually got sick while swimming and apparently he wasn't the only one. As he was swimming he told me that he could hear others getting sick around him. UGH. That's just disgusting.
But the reality was that pulling up from the race and declaring his inability to finish is more of an accomplishment than crossing the finish line. Perhaps he's reaching a point where he's realized that his health and his life are more important than accomplishment. Of course, imagine my suprise when he immediately emailed me Monday morning with a list of races he wants to do in the next 12 months. San Francisco marathon... and then the Augusta 1/2 Ironman... and then there's an Olympic Tri in Gulf Shores... oh and don't forget the 1/2 ironman in PCB again next year. For the love of God.
We're childless this week and enjoying the time to do as we want without having to deal with scheduling and tired children... I miss my girls but the respite is nice and much needed (on a side note, the obnoxious couple are still going and a woman has come in with her dog - interesting). I miss the pitter patter of feet in the morning and the sweet touch of Anne Bailey on my leg at night, but I'm also enjoying being a lone with my thoughts... and having some free time to focus on my friends and my husband. To care for them this week is a pleasure and joy indeed.
And then I had a breakthrough last night. John and I had to go to the Community Foundation of Greater Birmingham's annual meeting. it's one of those see and be seen type of events. A damned if you do and damned if you don't type thing. I always enjoy seeing the people that i've missed but there's always someone there that I spend a good amount of time watching so that I can duck behind something when they look my way. You know those type of people... anyway. John and I went and talked and smiled and smoozed. We saw some friends but saw a lot more people that I haven't really missed. You see, two years ago, I was in the middle of that madness. I wanted to be seen and noticed, etc. In fact, I would have been pretty geared up to be there when it started and stay until the last person left. Not anymore. I don't know if it's a maturity of thought or what can be attributed to this newfound freedom... I personally think that it's a realization that it's not me in the first place. I'm here to be used for God's kingdom and his Glory. I'm not here for me.
John's breakthrough was last night. When we got into the car after the stuffy obligatory cocktail event, he looked at me and declared, "I feel like I need a shower!" And it wasn't because it was hot in there. As we drove away we discussed how it is important to go to those meetings, but solely because we can keep the connections that are used to help others. It's important to keep a toe in the water but we don't have to swim in the muck anymore. As if to redeem the whole evening, I left John to run over to a meeting for a small little ministry seeking to help in the city. It's a ministry in desperate need of someone who has a toe in the water. It was as if God was saying - this is why I've put you here... OK ESTHER ... for such a time as this.
To God be the ultimate glory. Use me to further your kingdom.
4 years ago